Mrs What's Her Name
by Simie
Summary: From the movie PD2. Clarisse is just like any other bride, doodling her new name and dreaming of new initalsbut what are they?


Mrs. What's Her Name

Somewhere between sleeping and waking, Clarisse lay in bed. She was overwhelmed by a feeling of giddiness. Her eyes still closed, she snuggled down into the downy softness of her feather pillow, then stretched her arms and legs out wide. Feeling the warm morning sunlight falling on her face, she continued to stretch; this time wiggling her fingers and flexing her toes back in forth in sheer joy. As if on the very outskirts of a dream, she could still feel the pressure of his lips against hers and the words 'man and wife' reverberated through her head.Suddenly she remembered clearly the events of the past day. She was married to Joseph, her Joseph, her only true love, the delight of her life. And she had Mia to thank for it. In one bound, Clarisse was out of bed and, picking up the pillow that lay beside her, she used it as a partner as she danced and pirouetted around the room in girlish ecstasy"Your majesty," She was interrupted in her dance as Charlotte walked into the room. "I'm sorry, ma'am" Charlotte said hastily, "I'll just be going...""Nonsense, there is no reason you should leave," Clarisse assured the younger woman, "I just seem to be a little giddy this morning.""That's understandable, you had quite a day yesterday. I could cancel your appointments, if you would like me to.""I won't hear of it. Just give me ten minutes to get dressed and I'll meet you down in my office."'It's time to get serious now.' she told herself sternly as she hurried down the corridors to her office. This did not, however, stop her from pouncing on Mia when she passed her granddaughter and kissing her soundly on the cheek. "Good morning, my dear, dear granddaughter," she said in a singsong voice."Hi, Grandma," Mia replied with an indulgent smile. "Did you have a good night?""Just never you mind how my night was!" Clarisse said with mock sternness, blushing slightly."Grandma!" Mia was half laughing, half shocked.They walked together down to Clarisse's office in companionable silence and parted at the door. "Please tell Charlotte I'm ready for her, my dear" she said to Mia as the young woman was leaving. Sitting at her desk, Clarisse picked up the top sheet from the large stack of correspondence that needed her attention. She read it idly then sat back in her chair and stretched again. She spun her chair around several times till she was dizzy then, after regaining her balance, she took up a piece of stationary and began to write a reply.Halfway though the greeting, she dropped her pen and started humming. Then she picked up her pen and began drawing daisies on the paper. Still humming, she drew a large heart in the middle of the page and wrote Clarisse Joseph. Drawing curlicues around the heart, she began to write 'Mrs. Clarisse --.' Her mind drew a blank as she tried to complete the name. Starting again, she wrote 'Mrs. Joseph --.' Thinking it odd that she should not know her own last name, she simply wrote 'Joseph--.' She told herself that it didn't matter, everyone referred to her as 'Your Majesty' anyway. Even when she was no longer queen, they still would call her that. Everyone that didn't call her 'Majesty' called her 'Clarisse', so it really was no big deal. It's not like people had been used to calling her Mrs. Renaldi in the past so they wouldn't be thinking to call her Mrs. --. Mrs. --."Oh, bother!" she said loudly and picked up the next piece of correspondence. She didn't read it but picked up another sheet of her own stationary and looked at the monogram gracing it. 'I wonder what my new monogram will look like?' she asked herself. She began to write it in calligraphy style and once again stopped at the last initial. Deciding to get the information from another source, since she would be much too embarrassed for Joseph to find out that she had no idea what his last name was, she went back to work.She looked up when Charlotte walked though the door. "Charlotte, I'm glad you're here. I need you to help me.""Yes, ma'am," Charlotte replied eagerly, ready as always to help her beloved queen."Well, it occurred to me that I will need new stationary and, as a matter of fact, Mia will need to select a stationary as well. If you would please go get Mia, we can take care of that and get it out of way. We have so many important things to do before the coronation can take place.""Yes, ma'am." Charlotte hurried to obey but noticed just before leaving the paper still on the desk with little hearts all over it. Smothering a smile, she left the room. By the time she returned, the offending paper was not in sight and Clarisse was all business."Now, Mia, your stationary is very important. It represents you. It may be the only way people know you. You should have two sets, an official set and a personal set. The official set has the Genovian crest, of course, but if you would like, you may choose different paper. Just keep it simple and elegant. A nice textured cream or pastel would be appropriate. Your personal stationary can be a little more, well, personal. I have always used a classic monogram but you can choose whatever you like." She giggled sweetly and added, "I need to choose a new personal stationary, too." Mia and Charlotte exchanged amused looks. Clarisse continued, "Charlotte has a book full of different stationary ideas you can browse though. When you find something, just let her know. Charlotte, please order my new stationary. I want to keep a monogram. I have a meeting with parliament in five minutes." With that, she walked out of the room in a very stately fashion."What is her new monogram, Charlotte?" Mia asked. "I don't think I've ever heard Joe's last name."Charlotte pondered. "I don't think I've ever heard it either. I'll wait till she gets back and ask her. In the meantime, why don't you look though this and when you find what you want, just write it down. And don't forget tea with your mother."Mia looked through the thick book and was wavering between a little spray of roses with an A in the middle or one with a cat that looked a lot like Fat Louie that said from the desk of.The door opened and Clarisse came in. "Well, have you made a decision?""I really like this one." Mia pointed to the cat one, "but I suppose a queen should have this one." She pointed to the one with the roses."I see what you mean. However, the cat does have a regal pose. I think that would be quite appropriate for your personal use.""Really?" Mia said hopefully, and wrote down the number of it for Charlotte before Clarisse changed her mind. "Oh, by the way, Charlotte needs Joe's last name for your stationary. She can't remember it. Well, I'm going to spend the day with Mom and Mr. O'Connell to show them around Genovia and stuff, if it's okay.""Of course. Have fun." Clarisse waved Mia out and looked around distractedly. "I was sure," she thought aloud, "that Charlotte would have known his name, and that when I saw the initial I would remember. However, I can find it."She walked down to the main palace office, glad that it was abandoned for lunch, and started looking through the files. She picked up one that was labeled Palace Employees and found everyone that had ever worked at the palace in the past several decades, except for Joseph. Then, with a sigh of relief, she noticed that there were no security workers listed. She found a file that was labeled Security, but it was only a write up of security checks on the others.'It's got to be somewhere!' she fumed silently. She opened another drawer and felt she had hit the jackpot. In this drawer were individual files for each of the current employees. 'All right,' she thought, 'so as of yesterday he was no longer employed but surely they wouldn't clean out the files that quickly.' She thumbed through the folders and saw names that were very familiar to her, including her own. 'Of course it would help,' she thought, 'if I knew his name so I knew where to look for it.' However, she found it fairly quickly under J for Joseph. She pulled out the folder and read everything that was in it. Nowhere was he referred to as anything other than Joseph.Refusing to give up, Clarisse went to the security guards' office and searched it for clues. Again, all references to Joseph were simply 'Joseph'; there was no last name in evidence. Squelching the desire to go to his suite and look though his personal things, she noticed a drawer of the filing cabinet that was locked. Maybe there was something in there. She looked carefully for a key but finding none, resorted to picking the lock. She knelt on the floor in order to be at eye level with the lock, noticing the large dust bunnies. She knew that this office was so sacred to the security officers that not even the cleaning staff was allowed inside, so she made a mental note to speak to the guards about the state of the office. She had just managed to get the drawer open when the sound of the door caused her to twist around, the offending hairpin in one hand, the other hand holding a folder she had just pulled out.Lionel stood in the doorway, his mouth gaping. "Your Majesty?"Clarisse stood up automatically, large dust bunnies clinging to the hem of her dress, a smudge of dirt and a very guilty look on her face. Lionel took one look at the usually very organized office and saw papers everywhere and folders scattered all over the desk.Clarisse giggled nervously and said, "Lionel, what a surprise. I was just inspecting the office, you know, before Mia takes over. I just want to make sure everything is ship shape. The floor is dreadfully dirty, by the way. I thought if I could get that lower drawer out, I could clean under it."Ignoring her feeble excuse, he said, "No one ever looks in that drawer. It contains the most carefully guarded secrets of the country. When I asked what was in the drawer, Joseph threatened to deport me."Clarisse hastily stuffed the contents back into the drawer and shut it. "Well then, I guess I won't look. Tell me, Lionel, how do you like being an intern with security?""I like it very much, your Majesty."'And you feel you're learning a lot?""Yes, Your Majesty.""Have you been doing more background checks on anyone?""No, your Majesty, Shades won't allow me to pursue those.""Well, let me ask you something. If someone was hired and there was no record of the complete name, would that trouble you?""I don't believe someone could be hired without a complete name. I think that would be a breach in security." He considered his next words and continued, "Except, of course, for Joseph. There is no mention of his last name anywhere.""Oh, how unusual. Have you never heard what it is?""I asked him once. He just stared at me. It made me feel very afraid. I never asked him again. Shades said that I was the only one who had ever dared to ask him that.""Joseph is a very private person." Clarisse nodded. "Well, I'll put these things back. You run along and finish what you were doing.""Yes, Majesty."Clarisse looked at the mess of things on the desk and the forbidden drawer still slightly open. She began to put things back, trying hard not to feel like a failure for not knowing her own husband's name. Apparently, no one knew it."Clarisse, darling." she heard Joe call to her from the door, "There are other people who should be doing this."She looked at him and smiled radiantly. "Joseph!" She crossed the room to stand beside him and laid her hand on his cheek. "I'm so glad to see you."" I see you have been busy today. I've been watching you on the monitors for quite some time.""Oh, dear. I forgot about those.""I never knew you were so adept at picking locks," he murmured into her ear. "What were you looking for?""Oh, Joseph, when I woke this morning, I realized that I don't even know your name. So I've spent the day looking for it.""I see. I could never do anything to cause you unhappiness. Does it bother you greatly not knowing what my last name is?""Well, I don't know what to put on my stationary." Clarisse said, lamely."Oh, and I suppose that is the most important thing you have to worry about?" he inquired, looking at her intently."Well, and I want to be a good wife" she added more sincerely.He lifted her head off his shoulder and gazed into her eyes. He stared at her a long time and she became a little afraid, although not in the same way that Lionel had. Then Joseph kissed her so that every other thought was driven from her head. She never worried about his last name again.The next day when Clarisse chose her stationary, she decided against the monogram and instead chose the spray of roses with a large C in the middle.The End 


End file.
